src: add SetAbortHandler

[maxhfisher]

This adds SetAbortHandler, which allows embedders to specify custom behavior in situations where ABORT() is called. The current behavior of ABORT() is to stream both the native and JS backtraces to stderr and exit with platform specific behavior. Some embedders may want to change this behavior, such as changing where the backtrace is provided. Embedders can also use the handler to exit with their own behavior, but node will still guarantee an exit if the provided abort handler returns.

A DefaultAbortHandler is used to ensure existing behavior does not change unless an abort handler is explicitly provided. The only difference with this design is an additional stack frame in the backtrace for the abort handler, but this behavior was never guaranteed.

A new ABORT_WITH_MESSAGE macro is also added for cases where a message can be passed describing the reason for the abort. This new macro replaces existing calls to ABORT in various error handlers in node_errors.cc where a message is already available. This message is then propagated to the abort handler, but no changes are made to the default abort handler. That behavior does not change here.

[nodejs-github-bot]

Review requested:

• @nodejs/gyp

[codecov]

Codecov Report

❌ Patch coverage is 38.46154% with 8 lines in your changes missing coverage. Please review.
✅ Project coverage is 90.12%. Comparing base (efc0a14) to head (71e66f8).
⚠️ Report is 36 commits behind head on main.

Files with missing lines	Patch %	Lines
src/node_errors.cc	38.46%	8 Missing ⚠️

Additional details and impacted files

@@            Coverage Diff             @@
##             main   #64684      +/-   ##
==========================================
+ Coverage   90.11%   90.12%   +0.01%     
==========================================
  Files         741      743       +2     
  Lines      242196   242334     +138     
  Branches    45606    45637      +31     
==========================================
+ Hits       218246   218398     +152     
- Misses      15438    15445       +7     
+ Partials     8512     8491      -21     

Files with missing lines	Coverage Δ
src/node.h	92.30% <ø> (ø)
src/util.h	90.98% <ø> (ø)
src/node_errors.cc	62.58% <38.46%> (-0.18%)	⬇️

... and 72 files with indirect coverage changes

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